All this being said, I think that Elmer Gantry makes an ironically wonderful nom de guerre for me. In fact, I don’t know that I could have chosen better.
All the snow has turned to water
Christmas day has come and gone
Broken toys and faded colors
Are all that's left to linger on
I hate graveyards and old pawnshops
For they always bring me tears
Can't forgive the way they rob me
Of my childhood souvenirs
Lyrics to John Prine's "Souvenirs"
Anonymous said...Sir...I sometimes think that God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated His ability. This droll account of your life you call a blog is living proof. You mention that your blog is inspired by Marcus. Please study it further to learn the nature of true blogsmanship.
Dec 13th 2007
From The Economist print edition
The Manchurian candidate
“The Muslims have said they plan on destroying the US from the inside out, what better way to start than at the highest level—through the president of the United States, one of their own!!!!”
Two volunteers for the Clinton campaign have resigned over forwarding e-mails saying that
School days
“I know that folks were rifling through my kindergarten papers. I'm going to be disclosing them tomorrow. It will show that I experimented with colouring outside the lines. I was pulling on pigtails.”
Mr Obama continues to make hay with the Clinton campaign's excesses. ABCNews.com, December 12th
Free will
“I'm not here to tell you what to think. I got some sense. I know the difference between a book club and this seminal moment in our history.”
Oprah Winfrey campaigning last weekend for Mr Obama.
Job seeker
“Since I'm from Georgia, I'll say the opposite of Sherman...If drafted, I would run, and if nominated, I would serve.”
Newt Gingrich wants to be vice-president. “This Week”, ABC, December 9th
Food pyramid
“Carrots. I just don't like carrots. I banned them from the governor's mansion when I was governor of Arkansas because I could.”
Mike Huckabee discusses his most disliked food. Other candidates are equally opposed to vegetables; mushrooms are particularly unpopular. Associated Press, December 6th
Life's disappointments
“Voters are going to say, ‘I want to get my Christmas shopping done.’ They're going to go to their mailboxes hoping for an invitation to a cocktail party, and instead get a campaign mailing.”
Donna Brazile, a Democratic strategist, on why most campaigns will take a break over Christmas. Des Moines Register, December 10th
Southern hospitality
“He's masquerading as a good ole boy.”
Jim Hanks, chairman of the South Carolina League of the South, objects to Tennessean Fred Thompson's lack of support for reintroducing the Confederate flag. CNN.com, December 5th
Insane clown posse
“These people are crazy—crazy in a good way.”
Ron Paul's son on his father's supporters. Washingtonpost.com, December 10th
Morning Edition, December 12, 2007 · There are, I have discovered, four things in the world today that you absolutely cannot count on:
1) Airlines
2) Vladimir Putin
3) Giving a small boy a goldfish and expecting it to live very long
4) College coaches honoring their contracts
Let us confine our remarks to the latter, inasmuch as this is the high season when most college football coaches are anxiously looking for greener pastures. The same thing will happen four months hence with basketball coaches. They let themselves be wooed by other colleges, with the idea that they can just pull up stakes or, just as good, use these pretty attentions to rewrite their current deal.
Most everything in college sports is deceitful, but the coaching Virginia reel is the worst of it. After all, it isn't just the greedy, duplicitous coaches who are at fault here. They're seduced by athletic directors and, yes, college presidents. Everyone's on the make. As a consequence, it's difficult for anybody in college sports ever to decry the total lack of ethics that we see when coaches cut and run.
Now, please understand that in this great capitalistic land of ours, everybody has a right to better themselves. If some coach is at little East Cupcake Teachers College and gets a chance to take over the football fortunes of Glory-Be State U. A & M., hey, it's only fair to tear up his contract and wish him Godspeed. But when coaches at reasonably equivalent big-time institutions cheat and duck out, that's unconscionable.
The greater sin is that there's such a horrible double standard. Coaches recruit high school players. Sure, these kids sign up to go to a college. Some of them might even like the place. And some of them know they're going to get good money under the table from the friendly boosters. But mostly, kids go to play for a coach, not to play at a college. But they have to sign a National Letter of Intent — a bona fide contract — which locks them into that school. If they want to switch colleges — because, as we hear from the coaches' lobby, everybody in this great capitalistic land of ours has a right to better themselves — the players have to sit out a year from their sport.
At the very least, the NCAA — which is essentially to college athletic departments, what the Las Vegas Chamber of Commerce is to casinos — ought to allow any player the right to bail out the instant their dear, old coach does.
It's ironic that professional coaches almost never jump teams. Professional sports don't presume to be anything but what they are, which is a business doing business. College sports are some kind of s bizarre hybrid, so everybody has to fib some to keep up the educational pretense. With that kind of framework, why should contracts and loyalty and honor matter?
Unless, of course, you've got a vulnerable 18-year-old kid over the barrel. He alone has to play by the rules that the adults thumb their noses at.
Published: Tuesday, December 11, 2007
They Said It
Culled from the pages of WWD. Compiled by Dianne M. Pogoda
“I worry a little about calling it blackberry, but that’s what it is.”
— David Yurman, on the brand’s new packaging; Jan. 5
“I love breaking the rules and the ability to have other niches. There’s no limit. I think this is very important for retail.”
— Ralph Lauren, on his company’s new Global Brand Concepts private label division; Jan. 8
“I like a woman who takes pride in the way she looks. I like women who aren’t afraid to iron. People don’t iron anymore. Sometimes you gotta iron.”
— Rap star Coolio, on his new collection; Jan. 10
“There’s something to be said for being kicked out of your comfort zone. But I have learned that all businesses are alike and face the same kind of challenges. You’d be surprised at how much business is like business.”
— Newly minted Liz Claiborne ceo William L. McComb; Jan. 16
“It helps that I speak the languages. I can scream at [Mario] Boselli in Italian and beg to Didier [Grumbach] in French.”
— CFDA president Diane von Furstenberg; Jan. 19
“There would be a revolt in this country if the Super Bowl were pay-per-view. I think we should make the State of the Union pay-per-view.”
— Humorist Mo Rocca; Jan. 25
“There are more fat people in the world than too-skinny ones, and the fat ones have big, big problems. Nobody cares; they are not glamorous. We are designers, not doctors who have to care about ‘eating disorders.’”
— Karl Lagerfeld; Jan. 30
“Counterfeiters and pirates are thwarting economic development and endangering health and safety.”
— Kamil Idris, World Intellectual Property Organization; Jan. 31
“We’re cold, but we’re willing to freeze our butts off for a few hours.”
— PETA protestor Melissa Sehgal, wearing only a PETA banner; Feb. 2
“I wear Black Orchid a lot, but I’m not your average guy.”
— Tom Ford on his Private Blend fragrance collection; Feb. 2
“Young designers are so interesting and cool. [They] have a very clear sense of what people want to wear, especially young people. Not to dis people who have been around for a real long time. Obviously, there is a lot to be said for longtime talent and expertise.”
— Anna Paquin; Feb. 5
“There is a terrible tendency in
— Colin McDowell, Fashion Fringe; Feb. 6
“I think it’s the first season I haven’t been run over by Beyoncé’s bodyguard.”
— Cindi Leive, on the dearth of celebrities at the
“I’m the least electable person in the country. I would start out my campaign with the slogan ‘Religion is bad and drugs are good.’”
— Bill Maher; Feb. 16
“People look at me and David and they see fashion, they see family, they see sports. I think there are people who want to be a part of that. It’s aspirational.”
— Victoria Beckham, on her budding lifestyle empire, dVb; Feb. 20
“I don’t spend all my life at the gym. I’m not constantly at the hairdresser’s changing the color of my hair. And I’m not constantly on a camel on research because if I was, I wouldn’t have achieved what I’ve achieved in the last 10 years…
“More and more I’m realizing that [Christian Dior] laid the blueprint for fashion as we know it today, and the staples of a woman’s wardrobe today….And this was achieved in 10 years and continues today.”
— John Galliano; Feb. 27
“I just think that my work is so far ahead of the curve that it took a while for uptown to catch up.”
— Eric Bogosian; March 1
“I told [chef] Stephanie [Valentine] she could use lobster, caviar,
— Kendall Conrad at a luncheon for her new cookbook; March 1
“It costs so much that we are not even saying how much.”
— Versace chief Giancarlo DiRisio, on the helicopter designed by the house; March 1
“I walk down the street or into a room at Sundance and everyone wants to know what I think about their movies. I go to a fashion show and no one gives a s--t what I think.”
— Harvey Weinstein; March 12
“
— Elaine Kaufman, Elaine’s; March 13
“
—
“Fashion is not just aligning itself with art. Art is realizing it is doing well to align itself with fashion.”
— Tamsen Schwartzman, the Museum at FIT; March 13
“People want to feel privileged.”
— Sarah Lerfel, Collete; March 26
“I’m on caviar alert — it must be around here somewhere.”
— Gordon Campbell Gray, at the launch of Quintessentially Wine rare vintage club; April 3
“H&M is fantastic, but this kind of [guest celebrity designer] strategy is depressing because it plays with people’s sense of inadequacy, treating customers as schmucks because they need the endorsement of a high-profile person to feel worthy.”
— Giorgio Armani; April 18
WWD: What’s your favorite question to ask people on your show?
Larry King: Why.
WWD: Why?
Larry King: It fits any subject, any answer. It always works. You could ask why all day long.
— April 20
“You know what I did wrong at Barneys? I took calculated risks — I just didn’t manage them well.…We were a runaway train. We’d moved from heavyweight to overweight. We overspent tremendously. Perhaps my biggest oversight was this: I should have come up for breath every once in a while to see what the hell was going on with the numbers — even though finance wasn’t under my direct jurisdiction. Such is the consequence of a family-run business.”
— Gene Pressman on Barneys; April 30
“Eternity, as far as I’m concerned.”
— Fendi ceo Michael Burke, on the length of Karl Lagerfeld’s contract; May 1
“I’m on top of the world.”
— Marc Jacobs; May 4
“I wanted Alice to look like she could kick your ass, not just sit around and drink tea….I knew I didn’t want to be in the [fashion] industry. I call my designs costumes, not fashion. I didn’t want to make things people buy, but make things that people would pay to see.”
— School of the Art Institute student Robyn Coffey, about her Driehaus Award-winning postapocalyptic “
“I’ll still drive my car and do my own shopping. I do not intend to change my style or my life.”
— Newly installed French First Lady Cecilia Sarkozy; May 22
“We have a bulletproof contract. Nothing has changed.”
— Giancarlo Giammetti, on his and business partner Valentino’s contracts; June 14
“I psyched myself up for the job.”
— Actor Djimon Hounsou, on becoming the next Calvin Klein underwear model; July 16
“Jazz is very related to modern art. It takes off on a theme, goes on to something entirely different and then comes back. Abstract art is like a Titian painting without the head. If you look at the shapes and the colors, it’s the same.”
— Artist Francine Tint; Aug. 13
“They still look like bad girls, but bad girls in demure clothing, which is much better for their mystique.”
—Simon Doonan, Barneys
“There are a lot of celebrities who are into fashion, but I actually go to school for it.”
— Venus Williams, launching her EleVen collection for Steve & Barry’s; Aug. 23
“The most important part of art is to be authentic, not to let yourself be influenced by people simply because they are successful.”
— Artist Hedda Sterne; Sept. 4
“As long as I’ve been in the business, I have never seen a delay as long.”
— Jim Gold, Bergdorf Goodman, about the two-hour wait at Marc Jacobs’ spring show; Sept. 12
“I don’t really feel a part of the American fashion community. I really feel like an outsider, I think we all do, and we feel unloved here, so we want to go somewhere else.”
— Marc Jacobs, about the uproar over his spring show; Sept. 13
“I’m thrilled to be here tonight because it proves that I’m still breathing. A lot of people think I’m dead.”
— Lauren Bacall; Oct. 17
“I think it’s the first fashion show visible from the moon.”
— Bernard Arnault, about Fendi’s show staged on the Great Wall of China; Oct. 22
“[My personal style is] very
— Emerging musician Nicole Atkins; Oct. 29
“He thought he was Christ.”
— Biographer John Richardson about Pablo Picasso; Nov. 5
“Bad taste bothers me.”
— Giorgio Armani; Nov. 6
“For 45 years, everyone thinks I love parties and to go out. It’s all wrong. I love to stay home.”
— Valentino; Nov. 13
“I’ve been big. I’ve been small. I’ve been middle. I don’t see anything big about big. Bigger means more layers, more bureaucracy, less customer service and slower speed.”
— Millard “Mickey” Drexler; J. Crew, Nov. 14
“These aren’t brilliant ideas….The thing that we realized fairly quickly is that growth and success come from brilliant execution more than they do brilliant ideas.”
— Mackey McDonald, VF Corp.; Nov. 14
“I bought two Fendi fur coats. I’ll have to change the buttons — they say Fendi.”
— Diane von Furstenberg at Seventh on
“I feel like I’m part of an Internet revolution because my music is reaching 14-year-olds in
— Singer-songwriter Meiko; Nov. 27
Who's On First?
WWD asked designers coming to
"Is that a restaurant?"
— Christian Louboutin
"I don't know B-Rod! P.S.: I was told this word has a double meaning...but English is not my first language."
— Karl Lagerfeld
"It's the nickname of a New York Yankees player...and if I were to ask you who Bobo is?"
— Alberta Ferretti
"Is it the new iPod?"
— Alber Elbaz
"Is he a new designer?"
— Roberto Cavalli
"Mr. Valentino has not heard of A-Rod."
— Valentino spokesman
"What is it? Oh, I'm very ignorant about basketball."
— Giles Deacon
Excerpted from Womens Wear Daily, May-2007
from the New York Times...
At halftime of the Jets’ home game against the Pittsburgh Steelers on Sunday, several hundred men lined one of Giants Stadium’s two pedestrian ramps at Gate D. Three deep in some areas, they whistled and jumped up and down. Then they began an obscenity-laced chant, demanding that the few women in the gathering expose their breasts.
When one woman appeared to be on the verge of obliging, the hooting and hollering intensified. But then she walked away, and plastic beer bottles and spit went flying. Boos swept through the crowd of unsatisfied men.
Marco Hoffner, an 18-year-old from Lacey Township, N.J., was expecting to see more. Not from the Jets — they pulled off a big upset over the Steelers. He wanted more from the alternative halftime show that, according to many fans, has been a staple at Jets home games for years.
“Very disappointed, because we’re used to seeing a lot,” Hoffner said.
The mood of previous Gate D crowds — captured on video clips posted on YouTube — sometimes bordered on hostile, not unlike the spirit of infamously aggressive European soccer hooligans. One clip online shows a woman being groped by a man standing next to her.
Sunday’s scene played out for about 20 minutes, and at least one woman granted the men’s request, setting off a roar as if the former star running back Curtis Martin had just scored a touchdown. Martin was actually nearby, being honored on the field in the official halftime show, which had a far less intense audience.
Throughout halftime, about 10 security guards in yellow jackets stood near the bottom of the circular, multilevel ramp, located beyond the stadium’s concourse of concession stands and restrooms. One of the guards was smoking a cigarette; many fans do the same during halftime on the giant ramps, which are located at each corner of the stadium. Another guard later said they were not permitted to do anything about the chants at Gate D because of free speech laws. Yet when a reporter tried to interview two security guards after halftime, he was detained in a holding room, threatened with arrest and asked to hand over his tape recorder.
The New Jersey Sports and Exposition Authority, which provides security at Giants Stadium for Jets and Giants games, is aware of the raucous and raunchy halftime show. Patrick C. Aramini, the authority’s vice president for security, parking and traffic for the Meadowlands Sports Complex, said men and women could be expelled and even turned over to the New Jersey State Police to be arrested for their participation — although he said he did not know if anyone was cited Sunday. He added that other measures, like blocking access to the ramps, were being considered.
“The problem is, you got to watch four or five hundred people sometimes in the one particular spiral,” Aramini said.
“What do we do, arrest everybody that starts chanting?”
Such fan behavior is not uncommon at other sporting events in the United States, like Nascar races and the infield at the Kentucky Derby. There was even an infamous undressing in the National Football League’s marquee event: during the 2004 Super Bowl halftime show, a “wardrobe malfunction” exposed Janet Jackson’s right breast before a worldwide televised audience.
But the Gate D tradition at Giants Stadium apparently is unique to Jets games; the Gate D ramps are comparatively empty at Giants games. Perhaps forlorn Jets fans, who have rarely had a winning team to support, are seeking alternative entertainment on game days.
“This is the game,” said Patrick Scofield, a 20-year-old from Poughkeepsie, N.Y., who has attended several Jets games the last two seasons.
Denisse Rivera, a 23-year-old from the Bronx, was on a first date Sunday. When she arrived at the crowd at Gate D, several men pointed at her, signaling men at all levels to chant in her direction. After a brief moment of hesitation, she flashed them. Then she took a bow.
“I don’t care,” Rivera said when told that video clips of previous incidents, taken on cellphones, ended up online. “I love my body and I like what I have, so let everybody share it.”
Two security guards soon approached Rivera. The guards warned her about indecent exposure laws, she said, and let her go.
Jets officials declined to be interviewed about the halftime tradition at their home games. In a statement, the team said: “We expect our fans to comply with all rules at the stadium, and the vast majority do. For those who don’t, we expect and encourage N.J.S.E.A. security to take appropriate action.”
Greg Aiello, an N.F.L. spokesman, said, “I would defer any comment to law enforcement and the people on the stadium authority there that are in charge of fan-conduct issues.”
The State Police staffs every Jets home game. But Sgt. Stephen Jones, a spokesman, said the State Police did not make an attempt to prevent fans from congregating in Giants Stadium. But he said that there were incidents of fans throwing money into the center of the spiral ramps. Those fans then threw objects at children picking up the money. Access to the center of the ramps is now blocked off by a chain-link fence.
“Our emphasis is certainly not general security,” Jones said. “Something like you’re describing, the stairwell behavior, is a matter that the security would handle. Now if they come up with something where somebody needs to be arrested, the troops will go out there and effect that arrest.”
Some parents are not pleased with the halftime activities away from the field.
Randall Lazzaro, a 40-year-old from New Jersey, attended Sunday’s game with his wife and two sons, ages 6 and 9. He was at the base of Gate D shortly before halftime and said that cursing at games was probably the main reason parents did not want to take their kids to games.
When Lazzaro was told what was about to happen on the ramps at Gate D, he said, “That’s a disgusting practice and the police have to get involved, put a stop to it.”
Every Sperm Is Sacred is a song from the movie Monty Python's The Meaning of Life, later released on the album Monty Python Sings. Michael Palin and Terry Jones wrote and performed the sketch and the lyrics.
The song is a savage satire of Catholic teachings on reproduction which forbid masturbation and contraception by artificial means.
The sketch is about a Catholic man (Dad, played by Michael Palin), his wife (Mum, played by Terry Jones) and their 63 children, who are about to be sold for medical experimentation purposes because their parents can no longer afford to care for such a large family. When their children ask why they don't use contraception or sterilization, Dad explains that this is against God's wishes, and breaks into song, the chorus of which is:
The production in The Meaning of Life is quite visually elaborate, choreographed by Arlene Phillips to a storyboard by director Terry Jones. The hearty and cheerful nature of the musical number is counterpointed as the children are marched off to their fate after the song ends, singing a dour rendition of the chorus. The song is considered to be a parody and also takes a lot of influence from the song "Consider Yourself" from the musical, Oliver!
The campaign trail
Nov 8th 2007
“It's Saturday night, if you have better places to go, thank you for being here and have a good night.”
Hillary Clinton plainly didn't expect her audience to hang around in Indianola last weekend, Washingtonpost.com, November 6th
“I only got three [dollars] in my pocket.”
Multimillionaire Mitt Romney has to borrow from an aide to buy a cup of coffee, Associated Press, November 2nd
“For the first time in a long time, the name George Bush will not appear on the ballot. The name Dick Cheney, my cousin, will not appear on the ballot. We had been trying to hide that cousin thing for a long time. Everybody's got a black sheep in the family. A crazy uncle in the attic.”
Barack Obama on his distant relative, the vice-president, CNN, November 5th
“I think people are afraid now not to support us. I'm going to send him to their house, and he'll knock on the door.”
Mike Huckabee on his endorsement by action star Chuck Norris, US News & World Report, November 2nd
“That bird [Marine One] could be yours.”
President Bush points out the perks of the presidency to the billionaire independent non-candidate and mayor of New York, Michael Bloomberg, Newsweek,November 12th
“What they have done is, they have totally dismissed the fact that this guy's influence is going to lead people to hell.”
Televangelist Bill Keller on Christian conservative leaders who endorse Mitt Romney, a Mormon, Salon, November 6th
“I took a city that was known for pornography and licked it to a large extent.”
Rudy Giuliani on how he saved New York, Associated Press, October 24th
Morning Edition, November 14, 2007 · A few weeks ago, I offered up the thoughts of Gary Walters, the distinguished athletic director at Princeton, that sport should be held in the same high regard as art.
I thought it was a rather interesting and cogent opinion for someone to posit, but in the fabled words of the longtime football announcer, Keith Jackson: "Whoa, Nellie!" Never have I suffered such a battering. I think the nicest thing I was called in the responses that poured in, dripping with blood, was "apologist dingbat."
But then, after I withdrew the slings and arrows from my person and assessed the reaction, I realized how almost all the responses didn't really bother to address the question posed: Whether, in fact, sport might be an art. No, they were just mad, full of rage and fury. But it did serve to inform me all the more how much antipathy there does exist toward the American system of school sports.
Here are just a few of the more restrained comments:
"Spare me please! Primary and secondary art and music programs are going the way of the passenger pigeon while college coaching staffs ... are compensated like CEOs."
"When was the last time we heard a news report about the band or orchestra at some ... powerhouse involved in a scandal where students did not take the tests themselves?"
"High school building and renovation plans always include gymnasiums and weight rooms, but auditoriums are more viewed as unnecessary expenditures."
And on and on. I think what exasperates so many people is that the situation only grows more lopsided, that sports in our schools and colleges are not only ascendant, but greedier and more invulnerable than ever.
For prime example, The Chronicle of Higher Education has reported that donations to athletic departments have increased dramatically. College stadiums only become more opulent, so-called student-athletes more outrageous.
I'm afraid the game is over. In our American academia, the arts must be satisfied with the leftovers. Just consider the frank words of surrender spoken recently by John V. Lombardi, the president of the Louisiana State University System: "Mega college athletics ... prospers because for the most part we (our faculty, our staff, our alumni, our trustees) want it. We could easily change it, if most of us wanted to change it. All protestations to the contrary, we ... do not want to change it."
But Mr. Lombardi is only echoing what a certain Groucho Marx said in the movie Horse Feathers, when as President Quincy Adams Wagstaff, he asked the faculty: "Have we got a stadium? ... Have we got a college? ... Well, we can't support both. Tomorrow, we start tearing down the college."
That was 75 years ago. It hasn't changed, and, I'm sorry, but good people of the arts: it won't.
